No way! I can't do that. Was my first reaction. Then disbelief and irritation that the very first challenge was so impossible. I nearly made myself sick with anxiety at the thought and considered tossing the folded paper back into the box. Well, maybe if I go into the office early and do a few things then leave would that be cheating? When Terri woke up, she found me at the kitchen table, a wreck, head in hands, totally stressed out. She smiled when she read the challenge and helped talk me down from the ledge.
I took a big breath. It's ok. Everything will be ok. I work with capable, understanding people. Missing work today is not the end of the world. Wow, is my sense of duty and obligation to work and others excessive in an unhealthy and misguided way? Where does it come from? What am I afraid of? Letting people down? Others having to pick up my slack? Asking for help? Being/seeming irresponsible? Hmm.
So I let it go. I missed the weekly staff meeting. I went to the beach and walked barefoot in the sand instead. The sand felt good, like cool, fine sugar under my feet and between my toes. The salty air on my face and vastness of the ocean served as a reminder of the bigger, more important things in this world. Life is too beautiful and short to put such unrealistic pressure on myself.
And guess what? The office survived without me.
To the wise woman who submitted this challenge, thank you.
What a fabulous thing to overcome. I know that would be hard for me, I guilt myself every time I think, well maybe this day I'll call in sick... Go you!
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